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24 June 2017 @ 12:00 pm
03 June 2017 @ 12:00 pm
03 June 2017 @ 10:36 am
Somehow before Sakurai went back to Ishima’s arms, he specifically requested me to write our ‘night together’. He whispered that he’s quite afraid Ishima would get jealous. So without further ado, here’s the story.

It started when Satoshi took a bath at 9:30 in the evening and I chose his clothes in return for his deep understanding. He’s fairly calm about my weird craving but I knew he felt otherwise.

I sat at the edge of our bed, silently contemplating if I asked too much from him. Every time I asked for something, he would immediately smile and accept it. There were times that I reflected if I deserved to have such sweet, calm & loving person in my arms. Every moment I unconsciously lost myself to my thoughts, Satoshi would tightly embrace me and murmur sweet things in my ears. Knowing that he constantly understood my feelings, I would just lean my head to his shoulders and consciously smelled his fragrance that always remind me that he’s still within my reach, never letting go. He’s too observant that I wanted to crash that body with my powerful hug.

He finished showering 10 minutes earlier than his usual. He went out wearing a white towel wrapped around his waist, droplets on his well-built body. With years being staying with him, I still blushed at the sight. Excusing myself, I handed him my chosen date clothes to him.

I sat the sofa outside the room and waited for Satoshi to finish. Looking at the clock, it read a quarter before Sakurai’s arrival and I could honestly say that I’m looking forward for him. Maybe I was in a daze that I didn’t realize Satoshi to sit beside me.

“I’m sorry for this very stupid, childish request Satoshi.” I blurted out my concern. As much as I’m very much in bliss that Satoshi agreed to my stupid craving, I’m worried about his feelings. “Please do not worry and enjoy your night with Ishimaru, okay?”

He nodded. Patting my thigh, he leaned and kissed my right cheeks. “Enjoy yourself.” Too vague yet I understood his meaning.

I heard the doorbell ring signaling that my bear for the night has arrived.

Satoshi and I stood, embracing each other tightly. With the last stolen smell of his warmth, I opened the door letting Sakurai inside the house. I shook hands with Ishimaru Michiko and patted her shoulders in gratitude.

It took full 10 minutes before both parties separated.

My night with Sakurai started awkwardly. Who wouldn’t? When the mighty DoF Fujimoto Miyako, though in close relationship with all Arashi members, was not compatible being alone with some guy whose name was not Ohno Satoshi?

Sakurai Sho, the ever declared intelligent romantic guy of Ishimaru, started the conversation. “Well, I want to thank you for inviting me here, Miyako-chan.”

But of course, I snorted at the comment. Even the high DoS Matsumoto Jun knew about the cravings. “No need for formalities, Sakurai-kun.” The subject man smiled. “I guess, thank you for coming here.”

“Come here, Miyako-chan.” Sakurai opened his arms. In question of his action, he explained that he just wanted to comfort me. And I nod in appreciation.

“Thank you but no thanks.” I bowed my head. I really do not want to be enclosed with Ishimaru’s smell on his body.

“Can we sleep now if I may request? I’m sort of tired.”

I kind of laughed at his manner. Only Arashi could make that move to Fujimoto.

Walking him to my room, I genuinely asked if he needed something. And since he turned my offer down, I closed the door and sat at the bed.

“Do you want me to sleep at the sofa?” Sakurai gently asked, his sight pointing at the small sofa adjacent to the door.

I shook my head in disagreement. “You know perfectly well the reason you’re here, Sakurai-kun.” I arranged Satoshi pillow and placed on one side. Patting it, I encouraged him to lie on Satoshi’s part of the bed. “You can use Satoshi’s pillow.”

Sakurai nodded. Dropping his small bag to the floor, he took the laid out sleeping clothes of Satoshi in his hands. “Can I use the bathroom?” He asked and I nod.

One thing I loved about Arashi was they never minded if they even used each other’s boxers.

I was staring at the ceiling, a habit Satoshi pointed out, when I felt Sakurai’s body beside me. As a habit to pull Satoshi’s body close to mine, my hands itched to touch Sakurai’s. I guess I was too plainly obvious that the man himself pulled me to his. I knew very well I became stiff. The smell’s too manly; it’s definitely not Satoshi’s even if I forced my brain to think it was my lover.

“How’s everything with Satoshi-kun?” Sakurai cut the silence.

I’m glad he did so because I do not know if I should just pretend I fell asleep with his warmth. “The usual thing.”

That usual thing meant I was again thinking if I deserve Satoshi or not. And this usual thing was widely known by Sakurai and Aiba.

“You knew perfectly well that Satoshi loves you, right?” How comforting his words are.

I tried to close my eyes, imagined my current ongoing fiction. “What kind of a lover am I to consciously partnered my own lover to his best friend? I think I’m too delusional.”

Sakurai chuckled. Apparently he also knew about my weird habit of pairing Arashi members to each other. Even letting the real characters of the story line! “Like how you paired me with Aiba-kun?”

I really felt flustered. “Don’t.” I’m too stupid to even think of telling them about my fantasies.

“It’s okay, Miyako-chan.” I started wrapping my arms to his waist. “It’s your stress reliever. Do what makes you happy. I know Satoshi-kun would never mind about it.” With his comforting words, I unconsciously sniffed his smell.

“What are you, a puppy?” Sakurai slapped my back.

I pulled from his grip and looked at him questioningly. “Huh?”

“You sniffed me like a puppy!”

I punched him in the chest. “I’ll tell Ishima that you touched my butt on purpose!”

“What?!” Sakurai eyed me in despair. “I never did that!”

“You did, Mr. Big Pervert!” I unclasped my arms from his waist and wrapped my arms in my chest. “I honestly don’t mind. Since I knew Ishima’s short for you to notice I’m taller.” Waving my hand in tease, I began laughing at my own comment. “Is she that short? For you to lean to me and out of habit, you touched my butt instead of waist?”

“No!” Sakurai blushed. “Just don’t tell her Miyako-chan, or else.”

“Or else what, Mr. Pervert?” I snorted.

“I’ll tell Satoshi-kun how you sniffed me like a puppy!”

“How glorious. You don’t have any better comebacks?” I shrugged my shoulder. “I’ll let it go, Sakurai. So you should yours, too.”

He extended his arm to me and I took it wholeheartedly. “Good for us, then.”

We stared at each other for a second before we burst in laugh. We perfectly understood how we treasure our loved ones so much.

“Michiko’s a lucky woman to have you, Sakurai.” I said after catching my breath. “And I meant it with all my heart.”

“Satoshi too.” Sakurai placed his right arm behind his head and smiled at me. “Don’t doubt yourself.”

I nodded.

In the end, I was only able to embrace Sakurai before we slept. My cravings vanished the moment Sakurai was able to calm my nerves.

That very moment, I wished I never asked for this stupid request and instead, had Satoshi on my side.

mood: blahblah
03 June 2017 @ 10:35 am
“What if I break up with him?” Kuroda Chiaki bluntly said to her friends. “Would the rumors die?”

Kuroda Chiaki, Fujimoto Miyako and Ishimaru Michiko were having their usual hangout at Michiko’s apartment. It became their routine that every Friday night, instead of going at bars or karaoke, to meet and have movie marathon. Today, it was scheduled at Michiko’s apartment.

They just finished watching Matsumoto Jun’s The Last Princess when Michiko lifted the latest celebrity news about Matsumoto caught holding hands with a woman. Apparently, that woman was Kuroda Chiaki.

“That rumor went for almost a month now.”

Michiko patted Chiaki’s thigh in comfort. “Aki-chan, you know how celebrity rumors work, right? They’ll eventually die.”

Fujimoto sighed. “It doesn’t solve the problem, Kuroda.” She glared at Chiaki while pointing at the television. “And do you think he will agree to it? Come on, Kuroda, that guy surely had a worse problem than this.”

“Miyako-chan!” Michiko angrily slapped Miyako’s shoulder. “I think there’s a nicer way to say those words!”

“I’m just telling the truth.” Fujimoto defended. She grabbed for the DVD remote and pressed the stop button. She stood and leaned at the wall opposite Chiaki and wrapped her arms in her chest. “You have years of experience in this kind of situation, Kuroda. Don’t let those stupid self employed paparazzi to get what they want.”

“I don’t care about the paparazzi.” Chiaki flexed her legs and hid her face between her knees. “What if Johnny-san thinks that the only solution to shut this rumor down is to cut his work for a week or two, or even worse, dismiss him!”

“He will never do that, Kuroda.” Fujimoto whispered.

“You never know what Johnny thinks, Fujimoto.” Chiaki glared.

Scratching her head, Fujimoto breathed deeply in hope that she will be able to convey her thoughts properly. “I never did. But let’s put Satoshi’s situation 5 years ago.” She rubbed her palms together rethinking of the scandal Satoshi was accused with. “I stayed with him, comforted and even messed with him just to let those scandalous pictures out of his head. Those days, I did my best not to make him sad. I made sure that the guys will lighten his mood when he started to frown.”


“I never pressured him because behind those forced smile and laughter he gave me, I knew he’s feeling down. I never said ‘You can’t keep your hands to yourself, I don’t want you anymore. Let’s break up.’ I never did because that time, I knew he needed my comfort badly.”

“Miyako.” Chiaki pulled Fujimoto to her and patted her back. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

Fujimoto nodded. “It’s okay. So please, don’t break the tie you have with Matsumoto. Because I know, he loves you dearly.”

Chiaki hugged Fujimoto tight. “You’re strong. No wonder Ohno-kun loves you.” She chuckled when she heard Fujimoto snorted.

“Hello. How’s your day?”

Chiaki and Fujimoto looked at Ishimaru. The latter nodded her head in conveying each others thought on who she was talking to.

“I guess I have to go home. Satoshi might call any minute.” Fujimoto said, caressing Chiaki’s arm in comfort.

“Thank you for everything, Miya-chan.” Chiaki bowed her head. “And to you too, Michi-chan thanks.”

“It’s nothing. Glad to be of help!” Ishimaru posed her peace sign.

“Whatever, Ishima. You’re not cute at all.” Fujimoto said before closing the door.


Chiaki laughed at the duo’s fight. Waving to Ishimaru, she thought on how grateful she was for having such friends.


Chiaki opened the door of her apartment. “I’m home.” She greeted even though she knew she lives alone. Toeing her shoes off, she was surprised to see another pair of man shoe at the foot step.

Opening the lights, she called for the name she knew who would invade her apartment without permission. “Jun-kun?”

Right to her suspicion, her 4 year boyfriend emerged from the kitchen wearing her flower-designed apron with a good smell of curry plate on his hands. “Welcome back. I made you light dinner.”

Dropping her purse to the sofa, Chiaki hugged Jun.

“I think it’s better if I should place these plates down first, right?” Jun said while giving Chiaki a small peck to her forehead.

Blushing, she pulled a chair and sat, waiting for her boyfriend to finish his preparation. “How’s your day?”

“Hmm? Everything went well.” Jun placed two cups and a pitcher at the table. “You know, we were again invited at Kouhaku. Isn’t that great?”

Kouhaku, a musical show that greets New Year and broadcasts on radio and television, national and international.

“That’s great! So you guys couldn’t attend the countdown, then?” She couldn’t help but asked since the girls planned to have the nearest stage seats.

“Well,” Jun sat opposite Chiaki, greeted ‘thank you for the food’ silently and started digging his food. “I asked the others about it and we all agreed that we could attend the countdown even if it’s just the ending.”

Chiaki chewed her food in thoughts. In honesty, she was half listening to her boyfriend, half thinking about the rumors spreading. Technically, it’s not a rumor.

“Jun-kun,” she whispered. She already felt relieved after confronting the girls, but she just wanted to hear something from Jun. “Can we talk about something else?”

“Ungh.” Jun nodded. “What is it?”

She felt nervous. “The… the rumor?”

“It’s nothing.”

Chiaki glanced at Jun. Nothing? “B-but…”

“Don’t take it wholeheartedly, Chi-chan.” Jun eyed her with a smile. “It’s not a problem at all.”

“It is! I mean…”

But she her words were cut. “Don’t take it as a problem, Chi.” Jun grabbed her hands. “You don’t need to think about it all.”

Pulling her hands from his grip, she blurted her thoughts. “The problem lies within us, Jun.” Her stomach suddenly felt full. She stood, walked to the living room and plopped herself to the sofa.

Jun washed his fingers and followed her. Leaning at the tall table beside the sofa, he scratched his face. “What are you trying to imply?”

“You are the Matsumoto Jun who’s loved by everyone. I… I can’t take that away from you!” Chiaki grabbed a pillow and gripped on it.

“You’re not taking it away from me!”

She glared at him. “Am not? So you want to take it further until either Johnny calls and dismiss you or …"

“Or what?” Jun almost yelled. “I don’t get you any more!”

Angrily, she stood and grabbed a newspaper and shoved it to Jun’s chest. “This! I am sick of seeing myself on the front page with some hidden anger on the texts!”

“B-but Chi…” Jun took a leap and pulled Chi to his arms. “We’ve had this talk, right? I… I mean we had decided that we would just ig-ignore those? Right?”

Chiaki wanted to just agree, surrendered herself again in the world of hidden life of Matsumoto Jun. But she doesn’t want to be always questioned by her colleagues, some people who managed to catch her glance.


She felt tears forming around her eyes. “I’m happy. I’m super happy that the Matsumoto Jun actually became my boyfriend.” Clutching the shirt of Jun, she buried her face in his neck. “But I also want to enjoy being yours.”

“You have me. I’m always there when you need me.”

“But never on public, right?” She felt Jun tighten his hug. “I want those, Jun-kun. I crave those moments. But I know, I will never have that chance.”

“I love you so much, but I don’t think I could last forever hiding behind you.” She sobbed. “Can… can we end this r-rumor?”

“No!” Tears started falling. “And it’s not a rumor!”

Chiaki tried to push herself away from Jun’s grip. “Let me go, please!” She started struggling. She did not mind the tears flowing nor her heart feeling crushed. She just wanted to be away from the man who holds her heart. “For Pete’s sake you’re already 31! Grow up!”

“Never! If I had to announce to public how much I love you, I will do it. Just…” Jun hiccupped. “Just don’t let go, I beg you.”

Chiaki pushed Jun. Glaring at the man, she wiped her tears in despair. “I don’t want this kind of life, Jun. Don’t you understand that? I want you to hold hands with me when we go out, kiss me anywhere without pulling your cap to hide your face!” She hid her face with her palms, crying her hearts out.

“Chi. Please look at me.” Jun’s soft words made Chiaki’s heart melt. She waited for the complete disappearance of Jun on her life, but when she opened her eyes her heart jumped.

On his knees, Jun took her left hand and kissed it. “If you want, as much as I wait, will you become mine forever?”

Chiaki was stunned. They were just discussing about the possibility of suspension, and now?

“I know what you’re thinking.” Jun wiped his tears and stared at Chiaki with determinacy. “As much as I care and loves Arashi, I never imagined you out of my life. I love you so much that I almost lose control when you want a break up.”


“We already had this kind of discussion with Johnny last year.” Jun smirked. “Because Sho-chan wanted to settle down. And Johnny agreed to it, but with limits of course.”

Chiaki wanted to pinch herself. “W-what?”

Jun kissed the back of her hand. “I still don’t have the rings yet but I planned to buy after Sho-kun proposed. So will you please marry me?”

Maybe it was her confusion state that she didn’t managed to catch half of Jun’s message. Marriage. She sobbed hard. Looking at her boyfriend, she nodded. “Yes.”

Chiaki was surprised when Jun pulled her hard to his chest and carried her around the apartment. “Yes! Yes! I’m so happy!”

“Jun-kun, please put me down!” She squealed in happiness.

When she was placed on the sofa, Jun kissed her. “I never thought that stupid news would lead me to propose! I’m going to thank those reporters!”

“Hey!” Chiaki pouted. Grabbing the front shirt of Jun, he pulled the man and kissed him hard. “So when did you say Sho-chan would propose?”

mood: amusedamused
03 June 2017 @ 10:32 am
“It makes no sense when the four of us celebrate Valentines.”

Michiyo, Chiaki and Kumiko hopelessly stared at the gloomy faced Miyako and sighed. It was almost midnight of February 14th and the three was able to drag the obvious not-in-the-mood-for-anything-mushy Miyako out of her apartment. They’ve had done all the celebrations together for years so being moody didn’t anymore affect the three, much to Miyako’s dismay. And now, they’re spending their Valentines in a classy restaurant above the Shibuya Mall to lighten Miyako’s mood using delicious expensive cuisine.

“It makes sense, Miya-chan since it’s the four of us celebrating it. Unless you want your dear Satoshi-kun instead of us.” Michiyo said and gave Kumiko and Chiaki an act of being disappointment. “Eh, I’m a little down for expecting your man rather spending this with us.”

Miyako glared.

“It’s been a week since we’ve last saw each other, right?” Kumiko started, slicing the beef stew she ordered. “It’s an occasion we should grab since only holidays or so that we get to see each other, aside from the ‘hi’ and hellos’ we said when we passed by while visiting the boys.”

“And I had to fly to Vancouver to cover up some parts of the Olympics.”

Michiyo gave a long sigh when Chiaki mentioned Olympics. “Until when?” She asked while stirring her iced tea with straw.

“A week. Tomorrow…” Chiaki glanced at her watch and whistle. “Nope. Today at exactly 7 in the mornings’ my flight.”

Kumiko opened her mouth in some sort of reaction but no words came out. Miyako leaned her head on window and looked at Chiaki.

“Does Matsujun know?”

Chiaki nodded and took a sip from her glass. “We already celebrated this morning and told him my schedule. Though somehow I could feel his disappointment of not seeing each other for a whole week since it’s my first job overseas, we agreed to send voicemails if our time couldn’t match.”

“This morning? Arashi had their schedule packed this morning outside Tokyo.”

Chiaki blushed and hid her smile in her closed fist. “He dragged me out of my apartment at 3 in the morning.”

“That early!” Miyako squealed then right after hid her mouth with both of her hands in embarrassment. “That early?” She repeated, giddy on her seat which made Kumiko and Chiaki laugh.


The three looked at Miyako and shook their heads. Miyako was clearly not in the right mood when after eating at her favorite expensive restaurant, which she could only order every occasion day, her focus was outside the window picturing the still-busy street of Shibuya.

“Don’t tell me Satoshi-kun…”

Miyako shook her head. “It’s not about him nor will ever be about our relationship or so.” She groaned when her phone vibrated and when she looked at the caller, she huffed in desperation and stood. “Sorry but I need to take this call.”

“How about you, Kumiko? Did Nino-kun called you or what?” Chiaki nudged Kumiko. “Don’t tell me he didn’t-” She bit her lips when a blush formed on Kumiko’s cheeks.

“He did but we celebrated it the day before, in his home.” Kumiko moved her fork around to emphasize her emotions. “Aunt Kazuko apparently was notified of my whole day stay so our food were all prepared by her. Ni-nee and her boyfriend visited which became a bonus since I was treated with a white chocolate bought by Ni-ni since I treated him as her husband.” She laughed and snorted. “It’s hilarious, right? But Ni-ni’s so sweet I thought I was dating him instead of Kazunari.”

“Wow.” Chiaki said. “What’s Nino-kun reaction?”

“He’s obviously dismayed.” Kumiko shrugged her shoulders. “But I gave him an extra gift to wash his dimmed face.”

Chiaki grinned. “Oh and what is that extra gift?” She laughed when Kumiko turned red as tomato. “Don’t mind. I already know.”

“You’re both lucky.”

Chiaki and Kumiko looked at the depressing mood of Michiyo. Her back was slouched at the chair and her hands were playing with her phone. It clicked in their mind that Sakurai’s still at Vancouver and even them doesn’t know until when he would stay overseas.

“He still didn’t call?”

Michiyo shook her head. “We both agreed to wait until his arrival.” She grabbed her glass and took a big gulp. “I just wish I know the day, though.”

“I’m sorry girls but I need to go.”

Michiyo, Kumiko and Chiaki looked at Miyako and frowned. “It’s our day, Chiaki’s leaving in less than six hours and you’re going to take off?”

Miyako bowed. “I’m very sorry but-”

“What? Satoshi-kun called and asked you to leave us?” Kumiko glared at the tall Miyako. “Go now, if his mother’s already asleep.”

“It’s not Satoshi, okay? And will you please cut that mother-thing off with Satoshi? Mind you that we haven’t talked since two weeks ago.” Miyako bend and grabbed her pouch. “Dr. Eri called and she wants me to look at something.”

“Hey, isn’t that bad? Want me to talk with Nino about this?”

“No need. I’m keeping updates with Ma-chan.” Miyako crossed her arms when eyebrows were raised. “You all know I’m closer with Masaki than the three so please don’t make a fuss with it.” She rolled her eyes and made a face. “Eri-san really needs me at her clinic so with all due respect, I’m leaving. Chi-chan, good luck with your trip and make sure I’ll get a souvenir. And all the best luck with your love life. I’m off.”

Michiyo huffed and stood. “I’m sorry but I need to leave too. Needs to clear my head and I have a very early appointment with Nakajima Riko-san about some complicated IT developments her company installed with us.” She bends and gave the two a kiss in the cheeks. “Have a safe trip, Chi-chan.”

Kumiko and Chiaki stared at each other for a few minutes before laughing. “Do we have some sort of bad luck with gatherings?”

With all anime-ish look they gave each other, they shook each other’s hands and agreed to buy Chiaki’s snacks at the supermarket.


Michiyo took a cab and with less an hour of travel, she arrived at her dark apartment. She sighed and fished her keys at her bag, adjusting the eyeglasses she bought at the nearest drug store. With a click, she turned the knob, opened the lights and took her pointed shoe off. Rubbing her eyes in tiredness, she dropped her bag at the sofa and went on the kitchen for a hot chocolate barefoot. She mixed the cocoa with the hot water and stirred, glancing at the clock that said half an hour after 1 in the morning.

Can’t sleep. She thought while longingly stared at her phone. It’s afternoon at Canada so I might as well call him? But would he pick up when he’s on the job? Michiyo bit her lips in frustration. Sighing, she grabbed her chocolate and was surprised when there was a light on the porch.

“Who’s there?” She silently asked, heart beating fast with the thought of a robber or murderer standing at her balcony. “Hello?” She tiptoed.

She slowly slides the door and with a heart beat, her nervousness-turned-tears fell on her cheeks. “Sakkun.”

Sakurai, dressed on a winter coat and baggage placed at one side, was carrying 11 red roses. “Happy Valentines, Chi-chi.”

Michiyo didn’t know what happened the moment Sakurai greeted her but she found herself embraced with Sakurai’s arms. “W-When?”

“Just now, straightly went here. Hope you don’t mind that I used my key.” Sakurai buried his face on Michiyo’s long hair and breath. “I miss you, even though it’s only three days.”

“I miss you, too.” She breath Sakurai’s scent and her insides felt tingly. When they let each other go, Sakurai handed the roses. “Eleven?” She asked when she counted the roses on her hand.

“It means I’m only dedicated to you.”

Michiyo’s tears couldn’t help but gave another round. “Thank you.” She bit her lips and pulled Sakurai’s arm. She hid her crying face on his shoulders and murmured, “I love you.”

Sakurai slightly pulled and kissed Michiyo on the side of her lips. He gave her left ears a peck and with a deep voice, he whispered. “I love you too.”

mood: accomplishedaccomplished

“What I don’t understand is the way you get so worked-up with Miyako-san.” Sho Sakurai said while eating the Greek styled omelet Michiyo learned to cook a week ago from her spared cooking lessons online. Sipping on his hot chocolate, he gazed at his girlfriend who’s busily chopping some onions. “I know I don’t understand her behavior nor could always cope up with her mood but I think you should give her some credits. Satoshi-kun’s been locking himself up on his room for almost a month now, if not doing his job as a member of Arashi.”

Michiyo continued with her business, ignoring Sho’s soft pleading voice to stop making a fuss with Miyako’s behavior. Chiaki-san and Kumiko-san just ignored her, so why can’t you? The words that lingered on her mind and made her slightly angry at Sho.

“Miyako-san’s a very silent woman and I know she’s one of the few who looks like she never care for her affairs despite the look but when Masaki told me days ago that she’s been confiding on him for weeks and updating on Satoshi, and hear you make such strong words against her, I think there’s something bothering you.” Sho said munching on the last piece of omelet. “You only did this act when I left for Beijing Olympics for a week with no communication.”

Michiyo sighed. She placed the knife down and turned to face Sho. “What do you know?”

“What do I know? I’m also part of Arashi yet I myself do not know what Satoshi-kun’s doing behind those four-walls of his house.” Sho put his fork down and wiped his mouth with a napkin. He moved his tongue around his closed mouth and stared at Michiyo. “Why are so angry with Miyako?”

“I’m not.”

“If not, then why do you avoid her and not answer her calls?”

Michiyo glared at Sho. Washing her hands and wiping on the cloth hanged on the fridge, she walked to the table and slammed her palm on the table, making Sho flinched. “Then tell me the reason why I caught you and her tightly hugging each other publicly, even leaning your head on her cheeks as if you have a little amount left to control your hormones and go with your urge to kiss her on the lips? And no, you even kissed her on the cheeks or was that a centimeter away from her lips [?] and forehead as if you’re dating her! Add to that I caught you two always alone? Was it four or five times?! I know she has her problems but I think you forgot to see if I have mine!” Michiyo let out a long breath she was holding and wiped the single tear that left her left eye. Without waiting for the still-surprised Sho to answer, she shook her head in dismay, grabbed her purse on top of the wooden cabinet and walked out of the apartment, giving the door a loud slam.

She walked fast almost running to her feet despite the snow that’s making her legs stiff. Michiyo fished her car keys on her purse, opened the door and started the engine. Without giving a second look at her apartment, she drove to Satoshi’s place with tears threatening to fall. Perfect couple, my ass. She bitterly laughed at herself at the phrase her friends praised her years ago. But she had to agree since their relationship didn’t take its toll until now. They always compliment each other, one thing she envied with Miyako since she sometimes wished for some spice. And with the complete five times caught as-if gripping each other hard, she couldn’t help but burst to her deepest self and take out the demons she sometimes felt threatened. Miyako’s not the typical next-door girl type but once you happen to make way past her shield, you’ll get intrigued on what things are moving around her head and in the end, you might feel something more and it’s what making her itched to scrub Miyako’s face off with a rough sponge and let her bleed before someone else fall with the stupid nerve-wrecking woman. And no one else knows but Satoshi and she shared the same trouble which irritates her to the core. Apparently, it was well-known to the group that Miyako has her eyes on Aiba Masaki when she’s dating Ohno Satoshi.

Giving a deep breath, she parked at the side of a well-built three storey Japanese styled house, killed the engine and called Satoshi. “I’m outside, open the door?” She said after clearing her throat and eyeing the window on the third floor which seconds later revealed a sleepy Satoshi. The man nodded, abruptly closing the curtain. A minute later, Ohno Satoshi, after looking past for lookers, ushered her to go inside.

“What are you drawing now?” Michiyo asked after she slumped her whole body to the small bed of Satoshi, studying the finished paintings and drawings scattered around the small bedroom after seeing the unfinished but past half the content white sheet on the floor. “You went back with nature, huh.”

Satoshi nodded, giving Michiyo the clear view of the ocean and a man wearing a coat riding a boat.

“What’s the update?” She asked. If she can confide with Sho and Masaki, I can too. “Any new appearance, stage play or drama?”’

Satoshi shook his head. “None.” He said softly, clearly trying to divide his attention with his art and his guest. “You?”

“Had a fight with Sakkun so I went directly here for some fresh air.”

Satoshi stopped and looked at her in confusion. “You didn’t tell him, did you?” When he earned silence, he rubbed his thighs and let out a loud sigh. “You shouldn’t. You do know that right?” Satoshi leaned his head on the edge of his bed and stared at Michiyo. “Did he know that I know, too?”

Michiyo shook her head. “No.” Letting a groan, she rubbed her eyes. “I just went off my limits when he practically went on her side, that’s all.”

“So I presume you still won’t talk with Miyako?”

“I’m sorry about that.”

“I can’t control your feelings and tell you to forget everything so you don’t have to apologize.” Satoshi said, tuning on his old radio to fill the silence. “But how’s she?”

“Don’t really know. Last thing I saw was when she slapped Jun’s arm hard with a magazine when he yelled at her for being nosy about the group’s latest events.” Michiyo laughed, remembering the vein that almost popped out of Jun’s forehead from the persistent asking of Miyako that centers Satoshi. “I think her sorry-ass was making it’s way over Jun’s limit of patience now. After Nino’s outburst of her punching him using his DS, only Sakkun and Masaki’s her closest guys on the land. I hate to admit but Sakkun’s got a very long patience so, you know…”

“What do you intend to do about it now?”

Michiyo sat, leaning on her elbows and glared at Satoshi. “I’ll tell you if you tell yours.”

Satoshi pouted, letting out his breath through the nose. “I don’t know.” He spaced off thinking about Michiyo’s tease years ago that remained on his thoughts for a while. Giving him self a satisfied grunt and messing with his short hair, he gazed at Michiyo. “But maybe grab your once-decision of cooling it off?”

Michiyo bit her lips. She never thought that the topic actually stayed at Satoshi’s mind and now, he actually suggested taking the hard step. It was only for fun, thinking of ways to play with their half’s minds. But it never occurred to her they’re going to use it real for once.

“Do you think it’s nice to do it together?” Her mouth suddenly tasted bitter but it was what her mind chose after playing a staring game for almost half an hour.

They both stared at each other, trying to process if their sudden decision was wise.

mood: blankblank
03 June 2017 @ 10:27 am
Pairings: Sakurai Sho / Michiyo || Ohno Satoshi / Miyako
Warning: Michiyo being pregnant. Ohno Keitaro's Satoshi and Miyako's months old child.
A/N: ha. let's see pag nasiyahan kayo dito while i search for my muse. wala pa rin e. GOMENASAI! :D pag hindi, then you're both wrong about something.

Michiyo - April
Miyako - Esteban

Michiyo laid on the guestroom ten minutes after Sho went home. Though she only ate two bites from Miyako's cooking –an excuse that she was feeling not good-, her stomach was still empty. As much as she wanted to wait until the couple had their thing and searched the fridge for some leftovers, her mind was too preoccupied with things she knew she shouldn’t bother to think. Her sudden decision to stay overnight and leave her husband alone in their bed made it worse. She had the urge to pick her phone and call her lover, but the thought of loosing her pride made her stiff on the bed. She was not at first, honestly, but when she started carrying her twins in her tummy, she wouldn’t bet her pride on the line, even if Miyako's crush was discussed. She always thinks and blames her hormones. That is until she went into labor.

And now, another five minutes has passed, she could only stare at the ceiling while hearing Keitaro’s soft snores. Ohno surely passed his attitude of sleeping at his child.

It took two knocks and a name call from the soft voice of Satoshi for her to see reality. She glanced at her side and saw that the child was still in deep sleep ever since he laid his head on her lap four hours ago, so she didn’t know what made Satoshi call her in whatever the clock ticked its time.

“Yes?” She opened the door halfway and saw Satoshi worn on his bathrobe, hair spiked with few waters dropping and eyes slightly closed. She did her job to look at the clock and saw it was already past midnight. “What is it, Ohno-kun?”

“Sho-kun called.” The older man pointed at the phone near the kitchen. “He asked if you’re already sleeping.”

“Huh? He could have just called me on my phone instead of disturbing you guys.” She said, scratching her head in confusion.

Ohno shook his head. “He said he couldn’t contact you.” He sighed and patted Michiyo on the shoulders. “I’m going to bed now. Miyako might worry if I stayed up long.” He started to walk away. “Please don’t make Sho-kun worry, alright? He dearly loves you, Michiyo-chan.” He said before closing the door to their bedroom.

Michiyo nodded, dumbfounded on how stupid she felt leaving her phone closed. “Thank you.” She closed the door and made her way to the bed. Picking her phone, she clicked her tongue in disappointment. Opening it, she found six new voicemail and five mail messages, all came from her lover.

She lay down again, placing the phone on her ear and smiled at the voice on the phone.

“Are you already asleep, Chi-chi? Why is your phone closed? I can’t sleep. Please call back after hearing this. Love you.”

“Hey, love. I guess you want some time alone with Keitaro? Its fine then. Please do sleep properly, okay? Call me back. Love you.”

“Mi-chi-yo. It’s been two hours since I last called. I’m getting no sleep here, love. Please call me. I need to hear your voice.”

“Love, seriously. I already sent you four mails so at least open your phone and reply back. We have early shooting tomorrow and I can’t sleep. I badly needed to hear your voice, love. Are you angry at me? Please open your phone and call back.”

“I guess you fell asleep, huh? Good for you… This is stupid, haha. I’m smelling your pillow just to have my mind at ease, love… Fine, goodnight.”

“I know I said goodnight but I just can’t sleep. I’m sorry to flood your inbox but I just want a chance of hearing your voice, even just for a second. Please, please do call back once you’ve heard these messages, okay? And please do visit home before you go to work. I’ll cook your favorite for breakfast… And if you happen to misplaced your phone and get a nightmare, just always think I’m here and beside you, okay?... Haha. I can’t sleep!... Sleep tight, love. I love you and I’m proud to be the father of our twins. Good night and have sweet dreams.”

She sniffed at the words Sho left at his phone. Reading at the mail messages next made her in tears.

[I’m sorry if I made you sad when I left. I’m just sad being left behind, alone in our cold bed. I love you.]

[I love you, please always remember that. I’m sorry for my earlier actions. I shouldn’t act like a kid. You honestly deserved to be hugged and kissed before I went home. I love you.]

[Are you sleeping good? Laughs because I can’t. Not without you. I’m sorry, okay? Hope you forgive me. Love you.]

[I know I’m an addict when I give mails to the members but I can’t help but to keep on mailing you and imagine feeling your warm embrace at night. Mushy aside, I’m addicted at your warmth. Laughs. I can’t sleep!]

[I’m a weirdo, right? Oh well. Just call me when you received my calls and messages, okay? And please do visit home before work. Love you.]

Her tears distracted her vision on clearly reading and understanding Sho’s mail messages. She couldn’t help but to wipe her tears and immediately dialed the most familiar number in her heart.


Her heart jumped in happiness when she heard Sho’s voice. “Hey yourself.” She cleared her throat, trying to repress the fact that her tears were making his voice shaky. Stupid hormones.

“Are you getting good sleep?”

She shook her head. “I’m just staring at the ceiling, thinking blankly. How about you?”

“Just burying my face in your pillows, trying to get some sleep. You should sleep now, Chi.”

She sniffed. “You know what I’m feeling right now?” Sho whispered ‘what is it?’ “The feeling of being with my so-called child yet away from you. I'm happy to feel Ohno's child beside me as if he's my own son. But I feel alone here Sho-chan and when I was having this urge to have you fetch me here, I can't helped but choose the child because the thought of leaving him sickened me.”

“I’m sorry I can’t be there with you. You do know that despite being far, I'm still here, right?”

She nodded, biting her lips hard to refrain herself from whining.

“It’s a lesson that we need to remember, Chi-chi. At some point, I’m glad you decided this. At least now, we know how to fight these kinds of feelings.”

“By calling each other.” Michiyo hid her teary face with her arm and let herself cry silently. I hate this feeling. She was only glad Keitaro didn’t wake up from her voice and whimpers.

“Please have some sleep now, Chi-chi. We’re needed early tomorrow.”

“Okay then. Goodnight, Sakkun.”

“Good night Michiyo. I love you and oh! Thank you for calling me. I can sleep peacefully now.”

She giggled before hanging up. “I love you too.” Smiling, she faced Keitaro and closed her eyes. Finally, she can sleep peacefully too.

mood: amusedamused
music: arashi - miles away
03 June 2017 @ 10:17 am
POV/ARASHI members

A small white door, second floor located at the farthest grey wall of the fifth studio in Tokyo, with a written ‘ARASHI-sama Rehearsal’ pasted on the side caught Jamie and Madeline’s attention. The two arrived at the studio ten minutes ago and presented their special IDs on the guard-on-duty. Madeline kept rubbing Jamie’s back for comfort, giving-in her instinct that the woman, a head taller than her, wearing a casual jeans and shirt might get an impression as a stalker. With her glaring eyes and gritted teeth, added that both of her hands were hidden inside her jeans pocket and hair messily tied, Jamie acted like a rebel who’s ready to punch someone who stole her favorite blue eye-mirror given by her precious Satoshi.

“Do you think it’s wise to enter without their permission?” Their means the staff, meaning, if the other halves visited or accidentally encountered Arashi on public or private with their presence, might as well act as a toddler and present their butts for a hard slap. It was known and directed by Johnny himself, three years after witnessing the consistent strong bond within the couples. Shielding the boys’ features by mirroring a hard wall and raising their eyebrows for emphasis that no private lines are welcome to enter, the big security staffs made Madeline, Steffi and Casey shiver. Jamie, on the other hand, gave the different vibes and it made the men acted stronger despite the fact that they’re all women. It was all due to Satoshi’s soft plead to follow the order and not to open any scandals that made Jamie stopped her sense of masculinity.

We’ve not seen each other for almost three and a half months! Do you think it’s healthy for a couple when the other’s just less an hour away from the other!? No, right! To think of no hi-hellos even on the phone would not let me explode knowing they’re just rehearsing for the concert on the fifth studio, which I highly calculate is just a kilometer away!?!

Knowing very much the schedule of Steffi and Casey, Madeline almost made a mental note to suppress her fears of the big staffs. If not for Steffi’s big case with incoming suicidal tendencies to help the government lessens the figures and Casey’s six-day international appointment with the P&G VIPs, it was normal and a hundred percent of chance that Jamie would choose her as her company. But Madeline, accidentally twice caught by the two different security staff, hesitated to indulge with Jamie’s insistence on visiting her Satoshi.

Wearing her casual mild pink blouse with a small right purple heart beads design on the middle curve of her neckline that perfectly hides the in-between of her chest, a white lacy-at-the-edge skirt just below her knees and an open-toe heels gave away how pretty petite looking she was to everyone. Very much contradictory to Jamie’s appearance, this made her more protective of her friend.

“We’re not in public; hence it made the points of visiting higher.” Jamie said, fists closed in attempt to either knock or just punch open the door. “Don’t you dare think of leaving me alone, Madeline.”

Madeline. No one uses that name aside from her parents who lives abroad and Jamie, when she’s frustrated or angry. It made her nod absent-mindedly. Jamie gave a deep sigh before turning the knob.

A loud song of Attack It filled the room. Madeline followed behind Jamie but creased her forehead in confusion when Jamie suddenly stopped.

“Well what do we have here?”

Madeline’s heart skipped. A security! She raised her to look at a big man wearing ragged jeans and white shirt. Mads swallowed a lump in her throat.

“We’re here to make a small visit, Kagata.” Memorizing all the security staffs and other staffs made Madeline in awe with Jamie. She, for once, only remembered George-san’s name from the difference in built and race in all securities. But it didn’t help that Kagata, the second to the biggest and all-muscle man security Arashi have, shadowed Jamie and glared at her. Jamie, on the other hand, crossed her arms in her chest and let out a long sigh.

“I notice that, J.J., but can you notice that they are to rehearse for the next day’s concert?”
Madeline snorted. J.J. was the name given to Jamie by the male staffs, in link with her acting all masculine when Satoshi’s not looking. That explains that when her man’s on her side, she’s all too feminine. They all wanted to puke at her gayness to Satoshi Ohno. “If it’s okay, Kagata-san, we’re just here to take a glance at her beloved Ohno.” She said, waving her hand to lessen the tight tension between the two. “Jamie just missed him since it’s been four months they last saw each other.”

“Madi, in all fairness, if J.J. can beg, I’ll take it to consideration.”

“Beg my ass, Kagata. If you can just stop being an ass to me, then I’ll also take into consideration with your stupid begging.”

“Jamie.” Madi made a face to calm herself and pulled Jamie from Kagata. “I’m sorry, Kagata-san. She’s having her period.”


The music suddenly stopped and neither Jamie nor Madeline noticed it until the boys gathered in front of them.


“What’s wrong?” Sho Sakurai asked, wiping the sweat in her face.

“We’re here to visit.” Madeline stepped towards Sho and tiptoed to kiss his cheeks. “Jamie’s aching for Satoshi.” She whispered at his ears and chuckled. Sho laughed.

“Yo, girls.” Masaki Aiba waived and grinned. Apparently, he looks like he needed a break, at least five minutes, from the continuous dancing. Madeline cannot blame though, it’s already past 4 in the afternoon.

Kazunari Ninomiya and Jun Matsumoto waived and smiled at them, greeting them feet away and seated at the floor. Satoshi Ohno looked dazed but smiled when he saw Jamie.

“Jamie!” The loud yet soft boyish voice of Satoshi made Jamie’s tensed shoulders to slump. In his red jogging pants, black shirt and black cap, Satoshi’s all grin lighted the tension between Kagata and Jamie. He walked towards Jamie and hugged her, never minding the sweat that runs in his body.
Silence filled the room and Jamie continuously hanged herself to Satoshi’s arms. “I’m angry at you.” Jamie started, but voice toned down that only the two of them could hear. “You didn’t make any signs of being alive.”

Satoshi laughed. “I’m sorry but with all the upcoming second art exhibition, concert, drama and variety shows, I always seem to leave my personal phone. Mother might have it by now. I’m using my manager’s for better access.” He caressed her back, running a thumb on it like drawing something heart-filled picture. It made Jamie shiver.

“Fine. But please at least once a week, do something that I know you still think of us, okay?” Jamie mumbled, face hidden on the crook of Satoshi’s neck. Madeline and Casey once said Jamie was full of confidence with her relationship with Satoshi Ohno, but in all honesty, she was trembling with fear that one day, he will compile all her faults and negative vibes and throw it her face. A sign that he’s fed off with her personality. “You better go back to practice. Mads and I will leave now.” Jamie said once her eyes caught the slightly irritated dance choreographer beside the napping Masaki Aiba.

“It’s nice of you to visit but please refrain from getting any fight with them, okay?” Satoshi moved his head to the side and pointed at Kagata. “Please visit again if you have time. And oh, mom said she already missed your ramblings.”

Jamie punched Satoshi shoulders and pouted. “I miss aunt, too.” She leaned and kissed Satoshi’s cheeks. Bowing to the choreographer in apology and waiving at the other guys, Jamie pulled Madeline to her side. They made their selves to the door, but before closing it, Jamie yelled that Casey’s going home by the next two days and Steffi’s case will be on hold tomorrow, giving a big hint that the other women also wanted to see their other halves.

“That’s not hard, right?” Jamie grinned and sigh with relief. Humming to Arashi’s Troublemaker, she made her way out the studio.

“But you have your ramp rehearsals, right?” Madeline shouted, pointing at the clock at the street. 5 in the afternoon.

Stupid shit. “I’m late!”

Madeline laughed at her friend, slightly amused with her actions when the woman is a top soon-to-be international model. Understanding nothing with Jamie’s thinking, she made her way to her clinic.


AN: So this was actually done few years ago written for my friends, still unedited. ^^
mood: amusedamused
music: arashi - miles away
07 May 2017 @ 12:00 pm
15 March 2017 @ 12:00 pm